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Inspirational ideas, mind-body-spirit tools, and magic for your life.

4 Steps to Handle No-Fun Moments (also known as discomfort)

I was driving, grumbling at traffic, when I heard extreme screaming from the backseat. 

Being a mom, I took this pretty much in stride and only almost rear-ended the car in front of me instead of actually crashing. 

Luckily, nobody was being murdered; my daughter had just spilled a bottle of water on herself. Her shorts and the seat were soaked.

I thought things would be fine.  

They were not fine.

This was Defcon-245, red-alert, serious emergency time. WET SHORTS. Worst thing ever. Lots of crying.

I get it; wet shorts suck. Especially if you have to wear them in your fun parkour class for an hour. 

However, I also know that life is going to dish out some serious discomfort for my girl over the next many years. There’s no getting around it. 

So, I gave her a choice. 1. Go to parkour class and have fun, but with wet shorts. 2. No fun parkour class, but we go home and get dry shorts. 

Then I told her I really thought she could handle the wet...

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No More Apologies

Yesterday, I found myself apologizing for expressing an emotion.

I was in a high-stress situation, in a private room with a person who was there to listen, and it was a perfectly acceptable moment to have a feeling, culturally speaking.

Tears were welling up in my eyes and my body refused to keep them inside. It was as necessary to feel those feelings as it was to breathe.

And yet, there I was, apologizing for crying.

Even after years of coaching others to help them allow their emotions to exist.

Then, this morning, I read an article about a holocaust survivor who, while giving a talk about the holocaust and her experience, became emotional. In her talk, she, too, apologized for “being emotional.”

Here’s the thing, folks. Of all the humans who should be allowed to cry, wail, scream, yell, or do whatever they need at any moment, a holocaust survivor would be first on the list.

Seriously. After surviving the unimaginable, unspeakable horrors of a concentration...

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The Happiness Hoax And How It Impacts Your Health

By Endorsed Mind-Body Coach Elaine Jeffy

“The notion that a human being should be constantly happy is a uniquely modern, uniquely American, uniquely destructive idea.”  Dr. Andrew Weil

Flashback to the time my high school aged son asked me: “Mom, where’s your great big smile?”  Daniel had noticed the absence of the ever- present smile that had earned me the nickname “smiley” for much of my life.

So what was going on? Was I grieving a loss, disappointed in my life situation or….. just in a funk?  The answer was NO!  I was finally waking up from the lie I had unknowingly been living for so long – the lie that kept me locked in a frozen state of sham “happiness.”

I was a master at disconnecting from my own truth. For decades my smile had served as a mask protecting me from the disapproval of others.

I learned as a small child that any expression of “negative” emotional energy...

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Let It Hurt

By Endorsed Mind-Body Coach Elaine Jeffy

The disturbing events of the last year have created a wave of gripping visual images that float in and out of my conscious awareness:

Me, at the age of 11, marching for civil rights and singing “We Shall Overcome.”  Me, as a college student, when the slogan “Make Love Not War” saturated our student culture.

My great-grandmother embracing her son, my grandfather, for the last time as she helped him escape the pogroms in his native Poland.  He was hidden in a laundry cart so he could go unnoticed on his way to board a ship to America, the land of the free.  (Pogroms: a series of organized massacres targeting Jewish communities)

My children’s paternal great-grandparents who perished in concentration camps.

And finally….. the image of a grotesque, gaping wound flooded my awareness – the wound of racism, bigotry, violence and hatred that I struggled to hide for much of my...

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Top 5 Reasons for Being in Touch With Your Emotions

by Anu Gupta

A friend (who knows I’m excited by emotions) recently sent me this story.

Overheard at a Washington DC metro station, as a man came up the stairs and read the delayed trains screen.

                “F* you, metro. F*. Don’t f* me, metro. Don’t f* with me. I hate you metro. I have always hated you.” This guy is very in touch with his emotions.

The story, which makes me smile, hits a nerve because we’re all sometimes angry at delays and inconveniences we can’t control. But this got me thinking, “Is this guy really in touch with his emotions? How would you know? What does it mean to be in touch with your emotions? and why is that important?” These are common questions (at least for mind-body nerds like me.  I get clients (including myself at first) that think they are pretty well tuned into their emotions and don’t need to work on...

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Dealing with Loss and Change

I just took a class on loss and change

In the Great School of Life, I just took a class on loss and change. No teacher is quite like life experience. I learned much from my recent journey through the grieving process, and I thought you might benefit from a few mind-body techniques and concepts around loss.

If you’re like me and many of my clients, you may have ignored or suppressed past losses. You might even be downplaying a current loss in your life. I think grief is here to help us move through changes in our lives and to let go of the old in order to welcome the new. We may not always honor the grieving process during changes, because we think things “aren’t a big deal” or we “shouldn’t really be upset about it.” This can play a major role in pain syndromes, overweight, or any other problem directly related to emotional suppression.

For some reason, we save grief for the “big” losses like deaths of loved ones. Yet, there are...

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